You Can Bet Your Bleep

Confused by that title? Probably not, but if you are, substitute a** for “bleep.” Still confused? Substitute “ss” for the ** and that should clear it right up. Made you think, didn’t I? Just remember, if A equals B and B equals C, then A equals C. Got it? Good. If you’re now experiencing confusion as to why I would be writing a post on this particular subject, I’ll explain. It’s this. The word a** has become almost as commonplace as any word in the English language. I hear it all the time. I see it in print, too. Even political pundits on television are using the word. Evidently almost no one is above it.

I can clearly see that this word is becoming increasingly acceptable. The time when it was considered off-limits has long passed, and you may possibly be hearing it in your own home, maybe even using it yourself. I’ve certainly heard it in my home. When my two boys reached adolescence, their speech became heavily punctuated with this term, especially when they were referring to sports. It’s use was very predictable. Upon returning from some sporting competition in which they had just participated, I would ask each of them how they did. If they lost, the response was, “I got my a** handed to me.” If they won, it was, “I kicked his a**.” Didn’t have to puzzle that out. The meaning was crystal clear, and yes, I did let that slide. During my children’s teenage years, I was in the “pick your battles” stage, and that was not one I chose to fight. Besides, I always did have a hard time suppressing the urge to laugh.

I would like to point out at this time that this is as close to an off-color post as I will ever get. Personally, I prefer to keep my language clean, although I have to admit that word does have a certain humorous quality to it, so I don’t care all that much if others use it. I notice that the word is a staple for stand-up comics who can be counted on to toss it around quite freely, and I, like everyone else, can usually be counted on to laugh my you-know-what off.